Called by the Lord

I have been a nurse for about a year and a half now. I would say that nursing is a very challenging career. It's waring most definitely and it also takes a toll on my heart. I often get the question so why did you go into nursing, or why did you want to be a nurse. So here's to answering that question. Why did I want to be nurse.

In a large group and only a short time to answer I really don't like that question. But as I have thought about it for a while here it goes. Before starting nursing school and actual nursing my answer would have been I really want to help people, and love people during hard times. That is still true but goes to a new level. Now actually being a nurse and really understanding the day to day task I would say I love being a nurse because I get to love people in a way that most don't get the opportunity to do. I get to truly love the sick and be there for them during very difficult times. I get to be a familiar face to them and advocate for them daily. I get to listen to them tell stories about there family or about there sickness. I get to see them brighten up when i simply bring them a gingerale. I get to tangibly do what the lord calls me to do, which is love others before myself.

Yet it is also one of the hardest things i have been called to do. It really is so hard. It is never easy to love others before yourself, and I finally understood that when I started nursing. I am constantly trying to remember why I am doing this career, why in the world did I choose nursing. It is very demanding and super frustrating at times, it wares on my body and my heart. It breaks me down and shows me my sins every single shift. It pushes me so hard I want to cry all the time, I want to literally just throw in the towel sometimes. But then I remember the cross and Jesus. He didnt quit, he didnt stop loving me, he didnt give up. He died a horrific death so that I can live with his grace. So that I can show that grace to my patients. He is using me for his purpose not mine. And I am learning to be thankful for that. When I remember that, my soul can rest and I can be joyful.So I truly believe that the lord called me into nursing to transform my heart for a more yearning and desire to love his people and also to draw me to himself where I can truly rest and be joyful.